Studying. Cocks up my life.
Not that I have a life to talk about, haha. Back to blogging because I don't feel good. And yup, I can say my intuition is quite accurate today, didn't feel very positive about today ever since I woke up.
I have to stop feeling this way. I have to stop this from happening. Not when I just got over Paul.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Sunday, August 12, 2012
No, I'm not feeling alright.
Now what, I'm your toy?
Nope, I dare not say I still have anything going on with him. Nowadays he only texted me to ask to out to study (with unknown people dafuq), then talk horny -_- like as if I'm his horny entertainer. Like srsly? What's wrong with guys nowadays. But good news is, I think I'm getting over him. Yup, no more heart wrenching moments about him hell no. and I'm glad! ^^
Either I'm underestimating the exam, or I overestimated myself.
Yup, prelims in 11 days, O'levels in 1 1/2 months. And I'm not worried at all. I don't know, which pah to take yet. I'm only 16 and I'm tired of living. Yes, tired of living. Literally. Studying for the sake of studying. Why the heck is the bell curve even that high in the first place. Sheesh.
I don't want to be too near you but I'm missing you.
Yup. Me and Kenneth. Pure friendship yet mistaken by others as a pre-bgr friendship. Da hell? So I'm mistaken by many school mates out there. But who cares, gahhh. I don't know what to to say about him, to be honest. I mean, we're close but we're close a tad too quickly. Nasty rumours about him going around, but I guess I'm gonna give him the benefit of doubt for the time being. National day, 4 days of break for me. Feeling a bit weird not seeing him at all for these 4 days. I'm afraid I'll like him for real (although the possibility of that happening is veryyyyy slim) but anything is possible right? I can feel it growing inside me, no kidding. I have to admit, he's cute and all, but not my type.
Nope, I dare not say I still have anything going on with him. Nowadays he only texted me to ask to out to study (with unknown people dafuq), then talk horny -_- like as if I'm his horny entertainer. Like srsly? What's wrong with guys nowadays. But good news is, I think I'm getting over him. Yup, no more heart wrenching moments about him hell no. and I'm glad! ^^
Either I'm underestimating the exam, or I overestimated myself.
Yup, prelims in 11 days, O'levels in 1 1/2 months. And I'm not worried at all. I don't know, which pah to take yet. I'm only 16 and I'm tired of living. Yes, tired of living. Literally. Studying for the sake of studying. Why the heck is the bell curve even that high in the first place. Sheesh.
I don't want to be too near you but I'm missing you.
Yup. Me and Kenneth. Pure friendship yet mistaken by others as a pre-bgr friendship. Da hell? So I'm mistaken by many school mates out there. But who cares, gahhh. I don't know what to to say about him, to be honest. I mean, we're close but we're close a tad too quickly. Nasty rumours about him going around, but I guess I'm gonna give him the benefit of doubt for the time being. National day, 4 days of break for me. Feeling a bit weird not seeing him at all for these 4 days. I'm afraid I'll like him for real (although the possibility of that happening is veryyyyy slim) but anything is possible right? I can feel it growing inside me, no kidding. I have to admit, he's cute and all, but not my type.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
It gets hard sometimes.
So many things happened just over a span of two months. Laughed, cried, frowned, feeling unwanted and everything, just because of that one person. I may be called a fool, maybe it wasn't worth the pain and tears, but I know it would be worse if I let go.
Let's go back to where we used to be.
Family problems overload, I couldn't afford to give a shit about my feelings for him now. For now, I just want to friends with him, just friends. All these years, I can say that he's one of the closest friends of mine. Even though we don't have much to remember, even though he does not really give a shit about my problem and I was always the one who tell him my problems willingly and he just acted like how he should, it seems like I just can't do without his existence in my life.
Fuck all this emotional wreck in me.
I feel so confused right now. After all those complicated confessions, I don't know what to do any more. It's like, 3 years of friendship puffed into smoke just like that. It's not the same any more. For one minute, we were like best friends forever and the next minute we turned to be only acquaintances. I tried to talk it out, but he acted dumb. I don't know what to do any more. I don't even know what to think right now.
"Every girl will have a guy that they will never forget of
Maybe that's true, and it unluckily turns out to be him. My supposed best friend. And now we're just left with ashes of memories, unbreakable walls between us.
Let's go back to where we used to be.
Family problems overload, I couldn't afford to give a shit about my feelings for him now. For now, I just want to friends with him, just friends. All these years, I can say that he's one of the closest friends of mine. Even though we don't have much to remember, even though he does not really give a shit about my problem and I was always the one who tell him my problems willingly and he just acted like how he should, it seems like I just can't do without his existence in my life.
Fuck all this emotional wreck in me.
I feel so confused right now. After all those complicated confessions, I don't know what to do any more. It's like, 3 years of friendship puffed into smoke just like that. It's not the same any more. For one minute, we were like best friends forever and the next minute we turned to be only acquaintances. I tried to talk it out, but he acted dumb. I don't know what to do any more. I don't even know what to think right now.
"Every girl will have a guy that they will never forget of
Maybe that's true, and it unluckily turns out to be him. My supposed best friend. And now we're just left with ashes of memories, unbreakable walls between us.
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